Thursday, August 22, 2013

Foot paint

We were having a bit of a rough morning today.  Noodle had a pee-pee accident in MY LAP.  She was much more upset about it than I was.  She kept saying "Oh no!  I pee-pee on my mommy!" I decided that some painting would cheer us all up.

I planned to cover a section of the kitchen in trash bags and then hang up paper for paint.  Paint which I planned to put on a tray so we could use our FINGERS.

Huck had other ideas. 

As I was hanging up the paper he poured the paint onto the floor and Noodle immediately started using her feet.  We just went with it.  It was washable finger paints so I figured even if they made a huge mess I could clean it pretty easily.  And they did make a pretty good mess!

Afterwards I picked them up and took them right to the tub!  Everything, including the kids cleaned up really easily. Whew!

(Noodle was already sans clothing from the pee-pee accident - which was probably good since she managed to get paint all over her!)

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Confession: Today wasn't good

Today was a big reminder about how much I need to give up the day job and just be mom.  Or just one who works only when the kids are at preschool.  I spent most of the day with the kids on my lap where they watched a show in the left corner of the computer screen while I attempted to work on the right side.  They fought over who had more lap space and when I made them both get off my lap I kept having to shush them "Mommy needs to finish this email and then she'll get you a snack....turn on a new your helper when you go potty."

"Mommy is working, we will play when I'm done."

I'm done in 8 more days.  It can not come soon enough.

This used to work.  It worked for 4 years.  Now it just isn't.  I'm not doing my best at work and I'm certainly not giving the kids what they deserve at home.

Yesterday was just such a totally different day that the stark contrast to today is just disheartening.

Yesterday I only checked in on work twice - both times when the kids were happy and playing with out me.  The entirety of our day was great yesterday, Noodle even went to sleep a full 30 min earlier than her normal early and nearly 2 hours before her 'late' - and she's been mainly late to sleep for the past 3 months.  Yesterday was wonderful - today not so much.

Today I'm short tempered.  Today there were no crafts - not even the ones I set out to do last night before going to bed.  Today there was yelling, and then worse - that moment when I just check out, when my eyes glaze over as I look at the mess and  I want to run away from home or just hide in my closet for a little while.

Even now, I could (and should) go play with them.  But the mood is set and all I can do is count the minutes until Husband comes home and I can actually go hide in my closet for a little while.

I feel pulled apart and frazzled.  Realizing I've been living like this for years - for those wonderful early years of my children's lives - makes me sad. 

Next week.  Next week the new normal begins and I'm so, so thankful.

Countdown to The Year: 8

Monday, August 19, 2013

Start of a new school year

Today was Huck's first day of preschool. It was also the first day of Mommy at home schedule. It was great. I felt productive and relaxed for the first time in way too long. Noodle and I enjoyed some one on one time - something that we've never really had. I'm looking forward to much more time with her in the coming months.

I still have a little over a week with the day job but not so much that it is keeping me away from the kiddos like it used to.
I'm so looking forward to September and being Mommy at Home full time!

Huck is ready for school!